Beanie Babies Saved My Life! What I Learned About Risk Aversion and 3 Ways to a Balanced Life.

When I was younger I fell subject to the beanie baby craze. I had to have them all… especially the limited edition ones like the “Princess Diana Bear” with the "White Rose of England", Ooo that was a good one! The difference is I never wanted them because it was the “cool thing”. I wanted them because somehow, even at the age of 9 or 10 I saw the value in them. I knew that if I was paying a ridiculous amount of money for stupid stuffed animals, then so was everyone else...and if I held onto them long enough, eventually stores would run out and I could sell mine for more. I guess my brain has always been wired that way (surprised?).

The problem is, I held onto them too long. In fact, I never sold them. This was my first ever-entrepreneurial attempt that clearly ended badly. One thing I had to learn the hard way was that with a fad, they hit fast and end fast. By the time I got around to selling my beanie babies, nobody wanted them anymore. So here I am almost 15 years later and I still have like 200 beanie babies stuffed in a cabinet waiting for some love and attention. I keep them as a reminder… in business, yes. But mostly for life, if you wait too long to go for what you want, you often miss out on opportunity.

I started thinking about this today in the middle of my Financial Management class. As Mr. Wiley went on and on about how risk aversion changes the SML slope, my silly brain translated it to life. So here it goes…

Often in the stock market it’s all about perception. What is actually going on compared to how you see it can change how you respond. Is this not true with EVERYTHING in life!? Often the way we perceive things comes from our past experiences, fears, failures, and successes. When you’re younger it’s easier to take risks because you don’t see much to lose… with the beanie baby situation I think I was just being greedy. I wasn’t afraid I would lose out, I just thought the longer I wait, the more money they will be worth, but there’s always a top line before it starts to drop.

The older I got, the more my experiences taught me to fear risk…I learned to put up walls, avoid confrontation, and wait for a “sure thing”. Let’s bring it home, for example, true or false? It’s better to keep your mouth shut and not say what you really feel than risk losing a person, right? Maybe. Usually not, but it’s often what I think…what usually ends up happening is you lose them in a different way- they move on…and there you have it, opportunity lost. I’m not going to get too deep into that it’s just an obvious example I think many have struggled with at some point or another.

Risk aversion is the pessimistic version, but what about being overly optimistic? Is that even possible? I think so. In the stock market those are the people that take high risk with a low rate of return…in other words, they end up buying junk and lose money (hello beanie babies). But how can being overly optimistic be bad in life? To me it’s obvious, how about trusting everyone and everything? You end up getting punched in the face, so to speak, at every corner. You acquire leeches as friends and people walk all over you because you allow it. This used to be me at one point as well…what I had to learn is it’s not bad to love people and want to do everything you can for them, but you have to draw a line somewhere. There has to be a balance, as for most things in life. The beauty is finding that balance between releasing your fears enough to take the important risks and being smart enough to know where to draw the line before you’re taken advantage of. For this, I think may take a lifetime to fully understand…but here are a few things I’ve learned along the way that may help get you started in the right direction:

1.) Test Your Friends- I’m a social butterfly, but there are very few people I actually lean on for advice. They are the ones that have gone through the fire and come out on the other side. They aren’t afraid to tell me the truth and have proven themselves to be trusted. It’s good to test your friends, make sure they are there with your best interest in mind and not just for a good time…I like the “good timers” but they’re a dime a dozen. They don’t get to know my heart. OH! And always, always make sure the people you care about know it before it’s too late. This is something I had to learn the hard way.

2.) Find a Mentor- I have a few mentors that I go to for advice on different things. One is for business, one for spiritual things, and one for life in general. The good thing is they know me, but are disconnected from my daily life so there is less of a bias. They look at the situation with fact and logic, separated from emotion. This is one of my greatest assets in life.


3.) Believe in Yourself- It doesn’t matter if 100,000 people believe you can do something, if you don’t believe in yourself it will never happen. The truth is, if you don’t believe in yourself, you won’t have 100,000 people believing in you anyway. Bottom line, you are the passion behind your own successes.

So there you have it, funny how a 40 minute class about risk aversion in the stock market could translate to all this. It’s obvious I’ve had a lot on my mind lately, just thought I would share with the class. Anyone want to add to this list? Let me know your thoughts.

What The Bachelor has to Teach about Business and Life

So about a week ago I stepped outside of the norm and found myself watching the Bachelorette (I know don’t get me started). Shortly after the show was over there came, quoting my mother, “the best part…the whole reason for watching”. The first EVER sit down with the previous Bachelor Jake Pavelka and his former fiancée Vienna Girardi since their HORRID BREAKUP (gasp!!).

Personally, I don’t understand why anyone would want to subject themselves to an awkward scream fight between 2 people seemingly “in love” and actually call it entertainment but to teach their own, I guess. What I did realize throughout this experience, is that there is a few things we can learn from Jake and Vienna pertaining to the business world and how we conduct our lives on a daily basis.

You see, as the fighting drug on, what I noticed is Jake and Vienna had 3 very specific problems in their relationship that no doubt were the main cause that resulted in the break up. Ask yourself these questions and see if they fit into your relationships in the work place…

1.) How are your Communication skills?

Anyone blind, deaf and/or mute could tell that Jake and Vienna have serious communication problems. The constant “he said, she said” mess where they tried to justify their actions towards each other by expressing the other “never listened” while talking over each other’s sentences shows that neither one of them really heard the other person, let alone really tried to understand where they were coming from. Yet, in their own mind they are right, and the other is wrong. I feel like this happens a lot in the business world. Whether you are a manager not really trying to understand your employees or an employee hating on “the man”, the lack of communication often causes more work and stress than in necessary. I know it can be awkward to approach a co-worker or even a boss in a confrontational way, but biting the bullet can work out some misunderstandings and cause more peace in the work place then in the long run, it’s worth it. You just have to get past the fear and see the bigger picture. I think if Jake and Vienna had taken a second to see the bigger picture outside of the little fights about furniture arrangements and GPS systems and really tried to listen and understand where the other was coming from, they may have had a chance.

2.) Do you choose Honesty?

The biggest issue throughout Jake and Vienna’s brutal public therapy session is the fact that neither one of them trusted the other. Jake accused Vienna of cheating… Vienna accused Jake of being abusive…but if you really listened to their arguments, they were both dishonest at times throughout their short-lived relationship, which in return planted seeds of doubt in both their hearts. I know that the little white lie can be easy and is accepted as ok in most situations if you ask around, but one little white lie can lead to a bigger lie, and then a bigger one, to the point in which it is no longer okay. It’s better not to start at all. Honesty has been lost somewhere in the business world and people are searching for it. If you can be known as a trustworthy, honest person to your co-workers and boss then I guarantee success will follow. A little white lie may help you in the moment, but being a person of integrity and honesty will follow you everywhere you go and benefit you in every situation for the rest of your life. It seems like it’s not a big deal at the time, but if you watched, it’s not easy to see that it was the tiny insignificant little white lies in Jake and Vienna’s relationship that were the biggest issues in the end. If they had just been honest from the beginning, then it would have been easier in the end to give the other the benefit of the doubt.

3.) I know you’re looking, but do you really SEE the other?

If you take Jake and Vienna’s relationship and look at the whole picture, there is one thing that rings true; they never really took the time to really see the other as they really are. They both looked for what they could benefit in the relationship, not what they could give. So many times in the work place this is the biggest cause for unhappiness. Instead of going to work to see what you can gain, try looking around you at the people you work with and really try to see them for what they are, how they contribute, and how you can work together to really make a difference. If you go into work with that kind of attitude I guarantee your happiness level will elevate. Take it upon yourself to take ownership of your job and help others see their potential. Who knows? You just might make some lifelong friends in the process. If Jake and Vienna would have taken the time to really see each other and how they can work together in the relationship, rather than search for what they could gain I think we would have seen a very different reunion special.

So there you have it. Three ways Jake and Vienna have taught us to be successful in the work place and in life. Remember, these are life lessons; they don’t have to stop at work…but it’s definitely a good start.

What are your thoughts? Do you see how things could have worked out differently for them? Do you see any of these issues ringing true in your own relationships both personal and professional?

Back to the Basics...It Sure Has Been a While

It's been 3 years since I have revisited this blog. To be honest, I completely forgot I had it. It once serviced as a source of therapy for me at a very transitional time in my life and here it is three years later; I find myself needing such an outlet again but for very different reasons.

So much has changed in my life the past three years, and as I read over previous posts it became abundantly obvious that the person I am today holds just a glimmer of who I was then. The important things stayed... my strong personality traits, curiosity, sense of humor and hunger for life...they remain. But as I relive the stories of my past I can't help but notice the differences in my thinking, friends, and overall view on the world...although, I must use these experiences as part of the source of change. Some has come from life experience, some from new education and knowledge, and some just from the changes that come from living life. To be honest, the world has tainted me some, I have experienced heartbreak and confusion in ways I never would imagine possible...but what I have learned is most of the good in my life has come from walking through fire and seeing what life has to offer on the other side. I regret nothing. There are always things I will want to change on this journey but I love the person I was, I'm quite a fan of the person I am now... and I am looking forward to seeing who I will become.

In all my re-reading and self discovery, I noticed one thing that I feel will always remain constant.. 3 years ago I named this blog "Reinvented Dreams" because my life was changing so drastically. All the dreams I had once dreamt were gone and new ones had taken their place. I started writing because I was having a hard time letting those dreams go and allowing the new ones to arise and take flight in my heart. I sit here today realizing the same thing as I did back then, only with more understanding than I could have imagined. The hopes and dreams I had 3 years ago have been reinvented again. I see the evidence of them in the new dreams in my heart but I am also aware of the alterations. It's amazing how God puts things in your heart and then molds it with time to fit his plan. I didn't understand this process 3 years ago and felt abandoned and hurt by God for seemingly ripping all my hearts desires away. But as I look back, that isn't what he did at all... it didn't happen how I wanted it, but God has stayed true to his promises. The dreams he put in my heart are still there, but are constantly being reinvented into bigger and better things.

For all of these reasons, I have decided to begin writing again. Before it was 100% for me..this time I'm hoping to offer a little bit of knowledge, wisdom, or insight to the world. Let's be real, there are PLENTY of people on this planet that are far more equipped to be giving advice or wisdom than me but I tend to have a way of correlating life into situations so if someone can gain something from my ramblings then that would be ideal. Also, I am a sponge for knowledge. I love it and always look for more so I'm hoping this blog can service as an outlet for that as well. I would love to share my thoughts, but more importantly, I want to learn from others.

So here's a little bit of my back story... I am a Marketing student at Oral Roberts University and I love all that is business. I tend to look at the world through the eyes of a 1/3 therapist,1/3 closet evangelist, 1/3 business mogul. I'm that nerdy kid that gets all giddy at new business books and could talk for hours about marketing strategies, human behavior, theoretical issues, therefore, there is a good chance most of my ramblings will include one of the three...if not all. I have 3 jobs to help pay my way through school, one of which is a marketing internship that I LOOOVE . My life is extremely fast paced so I writing things down helps me decipher the world around me and put it into perspective. I don't know if this blog will help anyone or just service as another outlet for my crazy mind to process life.

But here it goes.